I really wanted to title this something like “ALL THAT FUCKING!” but thought it might offend people. HA!
Anyway, I have this impending feeling of something bad on the horizon. Maybe not this week, maybe not this month, but in the near future. We all go through our manic or depressed phases and generally can get along alright. We know our warning signs and how to deal with whatever may come. Right? Riiiiiight….
For a week or two all I’ve thought about is sex. Of course, we all do this many times I’m a day, but I mean almost to an obsessive level. I’m not talking about “oh, I’ve been watching porn every day” or something like that, I mean I’m thinking about it and who I would and would not fuck. Like right now, if that person was in the same room as me. It’s not even a me wishing I was in a relationship so I could have sex with my partner situation. Nope, I just want to bang a few random people (people I know, I’ve never really been one who picked up guys at bars or anything), and explicitly make it known I want no relationship. Just boning.
The problem is I know this is out of character for me and I’m cognizant enough of it for it to set off a few alarms. Most likely I wouldn’t go through with it, however, what if I do? I’m planning a weekend trip next month where I will see one of the people I have the intense desire to hit and forget, and come on, he’s a guy, you know he’d be down for that. How do I stop myself? Should I stop myself? I want to feel wanted and desired for a change. I won’t feel used because I’m the one initiating it. I’d be the one using him to get what I want. I already know that I wouldn’t want a relationship with this particular guy, namely because we live about a 5 hour drive apart and I’m not moving. Physically he’s what I want, emotionally is an entirely different story. But fuck emotions.
I just don’t know what to make of this. All these RAWR BANG PEOPLE thoughts on one hand, while there is still that one person I actually want a real relationship with.
What the fuck do I do?
Nomadic Head 
Pretty much going through the same thing right now. I have no advice, though. Sorry.
It’s cool, just happy to know I’m not the only one. I guess the bright side for me is that now, unlike when I was younger, I can recognize these thoughts/behaviors and so far I’ve been able to keep myself in check. Plus, if I end up going through with it, I’m also adult enough to be prepared with condoms or whatever. There’s a good side to everything, right? LOL!
Right. Condoms are definitely a good thing to remember. I hate them, but they are definitely necessary.